Some things should be left behind

This editorial column written by Maria McCoy was published in the most recent print edition of The GRIP.

The things we are not taking into 2018……. The pain. The awful, excruciating pain of 2017.

It must stay behind because it is crippling. It is suffocating and debilitating and has held me under for far too long….and so it must stay, and your pain must stay with it.

The regret. The regret of decisions made – the wrong ones that caused more pain for you and maybe somebody else, or maybe the right decisions that still felt wrong, that still caused pain for someone else in the long run. Your actions always have consequences, good or bad. Once that consequence exists, you cannot take the action back, and if you cannot take it back, why are you allowing the regret to eat away at you?

Where will you go with it in the new year? What purpose will it serve to you there? No, the regret of decisions made must remain in 2017.

The stress. The stress is going to try to follow you. Do not allow it a foothold in the new year. The stress of your finances, your children, your marriage, your employment, your family. Just leave all the stress behind. Make 2018 about your peace.

Having that peace far outweighs the need or the want to please everybody else, and if something gets in the way of you retaining your peace, cut it off. Every decision you make should be a balancing test – the decision on one side and your peace on the other – so make the decision to put yourself first because you deserve to feel that peace.

The doubts. Leave the doubts behind. Stop doubting your decisions, your acceptance, your reasoning, your fortitude. Doubt does not belong with you anymore. You can do the thing, so do it. Be that person you know you can be and never doubt your ability.

The things we need to find in 2018……forgiveness. Forgive yourself for the things you did not do, and forgive yourself for the things you did do. Stop feeling the weight of that pain. Let it go by forgiving yourself, accepting that whatever it was made you a new person. Move forward with knowledge of the lesson, but no more guilt from it.

Love. Find love and give it and if you feel like there is nobody to give it to, go put your love into a ministry somewhere. Go help feed the homeless or volunteer to help at risk youth. Take extra funds and donate it to a worthy charity that is making a difference. Go visit a nursing home or a hospice house and share your love with those who feel the least loved.

Folks, this is how you win at life. This is how you beat hatred.

You forgive yourself and those who never even gave an apology. You let go of the regret and the pain that has been weighing you down for whatever reason. You choose to have less stress and more peace.

You decide when to be offended and when to realize the person offending you is not as important as your peace.

You decide, every single day, to spread more love. You decide, every single day, no matter what circumstance, that your love will always outweigh somebody else’s hate.

 

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